The Way I Lurpe You

 
 He is sensible and so incredible

He is gentle and kind

Smiles all the time

And always makes me feel perfectly fine

 

He is serenity

He is all things divine

Just the kind of perfect

Any girl would ever want

 

And I remember how I used to wish he was mine

 

But I like…

Feeling alive, staying up all night

Smiling, laughing, crying

Talking about this and that

Feeling up and down

It’s one hell of a roller coaster ride of emotions

And maybe you are my kind of perfect

My kind of crazy

I never knew I could feel this much

And this is the way I love you

 

Everyone says he is a catch

He is charming and endearing

And asks me things that make me blush

But I know he’ll never be more than a crush

 

While you are wild and crazy

Flawed and complicated

Just so frustrating

And intoxicating

You break my heart

Then you make it sing

 

It’s 2 in the morning and here I am

Baring my heart and soul

And I’ve never felt more true

Never felt this whole

 

Because I like…

Feeling alive, staying up all night

Smiling, laughing, crying

Talking about this and that

Feeling up and down

It’s one hell of a roller coaster ride of emotions

And maybe you are my kind of perfect

My kind of crazy

I never knew I could feel this much

And this is the way I love you

 

Tragic,

Magical,

Enchanting,

Heartbreaking

You are all these to me

 

Now it’s time to tell you

You’re the one I want

The one I think about day and night

 

And if you ask me…

Yes, you make me fly

Feel crushed

And all cried out

All at the same time

 

But you are my kind of perfect

My kind of crazy

You’ll always mean this much to me

And this is the way I love you

 
 
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Book Rave: Something Borrowed

You just know you’re doing something worth your while when you find yourself holding a good book and grinning from ear to ear.

This was how I pictured myself when I was about done reading Something Borrowed late this afternoon. Only that I wasn’t quite holding the novel but was actually reading the ebook version on my trusty laptop, my eyes were sore from the eight hours plus or so of marathon reading despite the threat of uglier-looking eyebags.

Who cares? I’ve never had such giddy feelings since..well, Twilight back in its golden, prehyped days. Come on, a girl has got to admit that at one point in her life, she worshiped that book like it was the bible or something. But that’s another story.

I don’t know for the rest of you out there but my true measure of a good novel is when I could not simply put it down. Or I find myself smiling like an idiot, preoccupied all day and people begin to ask what is causing my buzz. Or if I keep reading my favorite parts over and over, at some point highlighting them or remembering what pages they are on, and I wish that I was the heroine who gets to utter those epic lines.

And the ultimate sign of all?

When I begin to contemplate on what I plan to do next with my life or how I am supposed to move on now that something so good has ended. That’s when I know that I got it real bad.

Something Borrowed was a pleasant surprise for me. I began reading it with low expectations because I’ve already read Love the One You’re With (by the same author) and it didn’t really had that much of an effect on me as the former did. I was practically bored to tears, but Something Borrowed was different. It became an unexpected souce of excitement and entertainment during my dull and uneventful week.

The book may just seem shallow and insignificant to some lit critics, but it is perfect for women who are currently searching for the right break and thrill in some essential aspects in their lives such as in career and lovelife.

I could relate to Rachel, the book’s protagonist, in the sense that I am also just the average kind of girl, dull at most times, painfully shy, socially awkward, an eternal conformist, Ms. Goody Two-Shoes, but is secretly resentful of those women who always had it easy in life.

At thirty, Rachel is faced with the all-too-common dilemmas that women of her age have: dealing with the enormous pressure of getting married and starting a family, career dissatisfaction, and the constant bout of loneliness.

However, her life begins to take an interesting turn when she wakes up one morning hungover, naked, and lying on bed beside her bestfriend’s fiancee. And all too sudden, she is confronted by a lot of complications brought by a seemingly simple case of alcohol intoxication from the night before: fighting her strong attraction to Dex, her bestfriend’s hot and smoldering fiancee, whom she has a lot of history with and is a constant fixture in her life, spending numerous nights and waking moments wondering if The Deed was just a one time thing or a prelude to something worth calling a wedding off, ultimately betraying her bestfriend of 25 years, the beautiful, charming, popular yet self-centered Darcy, spending fun but meaningless dates with Dex’s unattached friend, Marcus, being a willing participant to one of Manhattan’s most delicious and intriguing affairs,  paving the road towards self-discovery, and taking risks for a shot at happiness with the person you truly love.

Her journey was such a delightful and fun read  filled with witty banters with her crowd and an insufferable boss, steamy moments, and realizations about the true meaning of friendship, loyalty and love.

I’m quite contented with how things ended between her and Mr. Right who miraculously grew a spine by the last chapter. Thank God. But I have to say that reading the first few chapters was what really made me glued to my seat. There’s just something so compelling about a woman who falls so helplessly in love with a man she’s not supposed to fall in love with and being secretly victorious by the fact that she has a fighting chance against her usually preferred, stunning bestfriend. The undeniable attraction between her and Dex was really so palpable, their feelings so right, but their circumstances so wrong that their story is the kind that makes you crave for what will happen next. There was a good deal of suspense for the most part of the book and was very addicting.

Although I can’t really see myself stealing a friend’s boyfriend soon or worse, sleeping with him just to have the liberating experience that Rachel got, I still think I want to be like her in a way, the Rachel who finally developed a great deal of assertiveness despite how delayed it was. The Rachel who finally determined what she wanted in life and took a stand for it.

Because at times, it is in taking risks that can get you the happily ever after that you have been yearning  for.

Rating: Pure Awesome Sauce

 

Confession

A/N: I really love the way Vic looked after hearing Khun’s confession at their wedding. I saw wonder, bewilderment, gratitude, and love in her eyes like it’s her first time to hear him say those words. The moment couldn’t be any more real for me as it was for them.

~~~

She looks at him with eyes growing misty by the minute and at that instant she realizes what her heart has always known, that when all of this ends, it’s going to hurt.

It takes her a moment to let out a shy smile and tear her gaze from his intense eyes; too afraid that the wild beating of her heart will get the better of her.

It’s not like she wants to play dumb. Not really. For the past year and 20 days that they’ve been together, he never failed to show how much he cares through his gazes, his touch, and his efforts to make her happy. After all, he is the transparent one in this pretend marriage. But it’s always been I like you, Victoria-ssi.

Never like this.

It’s really the first time she heard him say it and she knows that it will take her a long while before she can forget the clarity of his voice and the sincerity in his eyes.

She tries to compose herself and order her brain not to go into total shutdown. She stares at him and finds him looking at her in that usual way of his: half fearful and half hopeful of what she’s going to say. Eyes that are in search for some kind of reassurance.

So, she allows herself to let loose this one time and let him hear what her heart has known all along.

Nichkhun-ssi, I love you too.

The depth of her feelings is quite concealed in her best aegyo voice, but the confession still left her reeling, and vulnerable, and exposed.

She takes a few tentative steps towards him and allows herself to drown deeper in his embrace, inhaling his clean, familiar scent.

The look he gives her then kind of makes her wonder how she’ll ever pepare herself for the onslaught of pain that’s about to come her way.

Because from here on in, it’s going to take a hell of an effort to go back to the way she used to be. Back to the kind of life she had before he happened.

There’s a slight stinging in her eyes again but she braves a smile for him.

There will be a lot of time for moping later, she thinks.

She reaches out for his outstretched hand and ignores the ache she feels in her chest as they walk towards their awaiting crowd.

Squee Alert: Kim Hyun Joong’s Breakdown MV

Dearest Hyun Joong,

God knows I tried to stay away from you for as long as I could. See, I never really got over the hurt you caused me 2 years ago but then you finally made me see what I have been missing and made my heart bleed once again by looking so devastatingly hot in this…

Gah, my head is spinning. What happened to your sweet, boy-next-door charm?

I know I shouldn’t succumb to weakness this early but I can’t pretend.

I’m in lurve with you once again.

365 Days

Time really does fly fast when you’re in lurve. Hee.

Today, I want to congratulate the cheesiest, sweetest, funniest, and most endearing couple in Korea…

Happy Anniversary!

It’s been a year of laughter, intense glances, cute jealousy, and spazz-worthy skinship. And we ain’t complaining.

Khun and Vic, thank you for making me giddy, squeel as if I still am in my teens, for being so entertaining, for making my Saturdays superbly exciting, for making me cry at times over your syrupy sweetness, for making me feel in love for a year…

And for just basically touching my life.

Thank you. Words aren’t enough.

Can you please remain to be adorable together for like…forever? 🙂

 

Khuntoria Flail Post

THIS.

This is the very reason why no other couple can melt me into a huge puddle of goo like Khuntoria does.

Antis might claim that this syrupy sweetness is all for the cameras but I’m betting the entirety of my minuscule savings account for the certainty of this one.

Of all the captured moments of Khuntoria, I can say that this one is the most awww-inducing. That’s really something because we all know how ridiculously cheesy they can be. They look so good together and so in love that they make single, loveless people like me get sentimental at times.

Sigh.

I may not know many things in life, but I do know one thing…

Those smiles, the loving glances, the nervousness, and Khunnie’s lingering moment right after the kiss couldn’t be easily fabricated.

Agree?

Oh, swoon.

***

Credit to khuntorialurve.tumblr.com for the super awesome pics!

Countdown (One Shot)

 

A/N: Khuntoria just celebrated their 300th day a few days ago, so I was inspired to write a short story about them. It really amuses me how Vic was kind of frustrated and crazy jealous of Khun’s recent CF. It just shows how deeply she feels for him to be bothered by that kiss. And that makes my Khuntoria heart do some acrobatics in sheer glee. I’m glad that Vic is kind of comfortable in showing her true feelings for Khun now. I always worried in the past that Khun is the more transparent one in the relationship. He has always shown how he can easily get jealous and all. Now, it’s Vic’s turn. Can someone give them a moment for some serious smoochin’?

What? In private, of course.

😛

***

It’s not that he hasn’t thought about doing it before. Or ever dared to.

If he were to be more honest with himself, he’d say that it’s the only thing he can think about in the past few months.

Kissing her, that is.

Sure, they had more experience in skinship than most couples in the show. It had always been easy for them to hold hands, lean on each other’s shoulder, carry her, touch her face, lightly tap her thigh, and hug on a few occassions, but it had always been a struggle to initiate that kind of intimacy with her.

Junsu and Taec have been enjoying calling him a wuss ever since they sensed his growing frustration about..well, his feelings and that inexplicable need to touch her lips. Seulong told him once, in one of their very rare drinking sprees, to grow some balls and just do it.

Sometimes, he can sense it in her too. After letting her watch that infamous scene in his CF, he’s been having some feelings that she was more jealous than she let on. Sometimes he can see that certain fire in her eyes that she wants it as much as he does, and she’s only waiting for him to make the first move.

But something big is holding him back, holding both of them back, from really doing it.

Maybe he is terrified of the possibility that she will kick his ass all the way to Pattaya once he attempts to get his way with her.

Maybe they are both too cautious of the repercussions it might cause.

Or maybe it’s that little selfish emotion that he feels whenever he thinks that he must share that moment with the rest of the world, with several cameras hovering over them.

He doesn’t want to share that little privacy, that little piece of happiness with everyone. He doesn’t want everyone to see how her eyes would close as he gets near, how she would respond to his touch…how beautiful and soft she would look, and if his ears would turn a  very deep shade of red.

He wants every little detail to be only seen in his or her memory. He wants all of her in that moment, not spoil it with the consideration of the beautiful angles in which they should turn their heads just for people to get a closer look.

He wants to wait for the right time, for the perfect moment when he gets to pour his heart out in a kiss and tell her how much she means to him. Until then, he vows to not let his urges and feelings overpower his being.

But watching Victoria in her deep slumber on the plane back to Seoul, head rested on his left shoulder, with furrowed brows and an adorable pout, he feels his resolve instantly weaken at the sight of her- at the beautiful sight of her.

She mumbles something incoherent and her brows furrow some more. Nichkhun suppresses the urge to chuckle. Even in her sleep, she never fails to amuse him. It’s just one of the hundred reasons why he’s so drawn to her.

He reaches out and smoothens her brows, afraid that she is having a bad dream again.

Victoria wakes up a few heartbeats later, flutters her eyes and gives him an unsteady gaze and lets out a slurred hey.

He looks at her and feels his insides soar. He cannot, for the life of him, understand how someone can look that insanely beautiful upon waking up. It’s a face he wants to see for a long while and if possible, in his every waking moment in the not-so-distant future.

Victoria gives him a little smile, one that she always does whenever she catches him looking at her in that intense way of his.

“Were you having a bad dream again?” he asks worriedly. He knows how she’s prone to having nightmares in the last couple of months. She sends him a text message whenever she experiences one and they usually spend the night talking on the phone just to chase the bad dreams away. Sometimes he even sings her to sleep (which always makes her laugh at first) until he hears her soft snores on the other end of the line.  He just thanks his lucky stars for not having to share a room with Chansung anymore or else he’ll never hear the end of it.

Victoria nods and frowns a bit. “It was about you.”

Nichkhun shoots her a puzzled look. “I’m giving you nightmares now?” he asks, chuckling. “Was I bad?”

“Very,” she answers, narrowing her eyes. “You were kissing three pretty girls in a CF this time.” She pouts at him.

He laughs at that and finds Victoria giving him a dirty glare. He throws his arms around her in the hope of appeasing her a little.

It doesn’t.

He holds her hand instead and entwines his fingers with hers, glad that there are no cameras nearby. The rest of the crew are either busy chatting or eating several seats away.

He smiles at the thought that she doesn’t attempt to take her hand away. Holding her like this has always been a pleasant moment for him.

“Feeling better?” he tentatively asks.

Victoria leans her head on his shoulder in response and gazes at their intertwined hands, looking somewhat pensive.

“I know you have to make money and all but it’s just so hard to understand.” She confesses with downcast eyes. “And I don’t even know why I am jealous.”

There goes the all too familiar stirrings in Nichkhun’s heart again.  How many times have they been confused in the past? He totally lost count, to be honest. They have blurred the lines one too many times, and he really doesn’t know how to draw a clear line between reality and make-believe anymore. Or if he ever has a plan to get out of this confusion. Or if he still claims to be confused like he was a couple of months back.

Because if there’s anything that his heart has been wanting to tell him all this time, it is the fact that what he feels for her is as real and obvious as the sun rising in the east. And he hopes, God he hopes, that Victoria sees it too.

“You shouldn’t be.” He tells her in a voice too earnest for a conversation in a plane.

“You’re right. I mean that’s work. And this,” she motions with her hands “is also work. Really. I shouldn’t be. God, what was I thinking?” she asks in utter frustration.

Nichkhun draws her near instead. He lifts her chin just so she can look at him in the eye and make her understand something.

“Stop stressing over one silly thing because…” he pauses as he tries to inhale some air to calm himself. “I’m all yours. You ought to know that.” He looks at her straightly, quite worried how she’ll react this time.

Victoria just opens and closes her mouth, seemingly at a loss for words.

“Besides, do you have any idea about what I plan to do right after we leave the show?” He asks her in a whisper as he draws his face near hers. He doesn’t even realize how vulnerable he looked at that instant, laying out his heart for her to take.

“W-What?” she stammers, already flustered by the intensity of his gaze.

“I’m going to kiss you all day,” he begins. “Until I make you realize what you mean to me. Until I make your uncertainties go away, and make you understand that there will never be no one else.”

That there can never be no one else, he says to himself. His chest feels like it’s ready to burst at any moment.

It is only several moments later when he notices Victoria tighten her hold on his hand.

“I..” she falters. “You know how much I hate broken promises, right?” she tells him with a little smile, her eyes sparkling evocatively.

Nichkhun squeezes her hand back.

“I have no intention of breaking it anyway.” he responds, his eyes blazing with mischief and excitement.

They both laugh as he lets their heads touch, basking in the moment.

Countdowns will never be the same again.

***

Credits to khuntorialurve.tumblr.com for the picture above. Kamsahamnida!


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